In the past 2 days and amidst indescribable sadness and disbelief I found myself laying on the hospital bed thinking of all the beautiful and perfect things that I had seen.
After the deafening silence when the doppler was placed on my stomach the morning before, my obstetrician used her ultrasound machine. There he/she was - very still but so, so perfect. Later that day I saw him/her again on the screen, a lot clearer. A beautiful profile, little hands and feet.....just one word - PERFECT. Tomorrow I will know if my baby is a boy or girl, we'll say goodbye and remember forever.
I have shed tears until there seemed to be no more left, but there is and there always will be. I know without a doubt however that there is so much beauty around me. My home holds the most dearest to me - my husband and little boy - BEAUTY! I have friends and family who, although feel awkward about what to say - and I know there are no words to say - love us and are grieving with us. Thank you.
Thank you my Jesus for all the beauty and perfect things you have blessed me with.
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